Where is the happy medium? We’re always searching for what is the best path, but not pushing my dad too much.

What is the happy medium in our lives? Not pushing ourselves too hard, but hard enough? As my friend said today, you gotta find what works for you without getting depressed.

How much time in the hospital is enough? I cannot say. It varies day by day. Today I left around 3:45. Tomorrow, can I leave earlier so I can breathe before cooking? How can I make sure Era gets to breathe and take a break while knowing I can’t force anyone to take a break?

Who am I accountable to? If it is to God, then God leads me, and sometimes it looks like more time, like today, and other days that kids have various appointments, it’s going to be less time.

I played Connect Four with my dad today, and I tried really hard not to win. And I feel like my dad did, too. No one wanted to win. We both wanted the other person to win. In that mentality, what would my dad want for me? How much time is sufficient? How should I spend my time knowing this is a marathon, as Rishi says, not a sprint.

I have given up my happiest place in the world, my school. I need to take time to breathe so that I can continue to pursue God in the midst of this transition and follow His leading for my life.