On Saturday, hate came to town.  What would you have down if this happened in your city?

Knowing that going downtown to protest the Klan, etc, could put your life at risk, would you go anyway to stand up for equality?  My friend did just that.  And so did Heather.  Thank you, Heather.  Thank you to all who were brave enough to do that.

And if you saw a morning meeting of police officers, would you stop to thank them for their service, for risking their lives everyday for us? What if your husband was a police officer?  Would you be able to stay calm for your kids?

What if you made the decision to stay as far away as possible from downtown, but on your way home from a birthday party you looked to the right from the highway and saw a line of people holding shields and confederate flags?  Long line of people with scary signs, more and more of them.  You’d instinctively pull into the farthest lane from them, wouldn’t you?

And to your kids, wouldn’t you say, “These people don’t think everyone is equal.  They think they are better than everyone.” Pause to steady your voice.  “We think everyone is equal.  It doesn’t matter what color you are.”  And then maybe you’d say something silly like, “No matter if you’re red or purple.”  And then perhaps you’d go deeper and say say that “we are all children of God.  God loves all of us.”

And then you would have lunch with your friends and thank God for them.

And then you’d check the news on your phone, see a video of an out-of-state car ramming into other cars, hurting people on purpose, you’d scream and tell everyone you know to stay home, right?

And when you saw that two police officers died, wouldn’t it be suddenly hard to breathe?

Maybe you’d watch movies with “brave” in the title as you text your friends that you are okay.

You are so sad but no tears come out.

And when you the cathartic rainstorm comes at night, you’d be on your knees, praying.

That was Saturday in Charlottesville.

Sunday, the town went to church, and we prayed for our city like never before.

I grew up in Charlottesville.  We lived in apartments for people who worked at UVA.  My best friend was from Egypt.  My other friends were from Turkey and China.  Other close friends were kids of lawyers and store managers and professors and basically good people.  I felt loved.  I went to public schools third through eighth grade, and I felt at home. In high school, we prayed together. My teachers dedicated themselves to teaching us and loving us the best they could.

In graduate school at UVA, some people who thought they knew better tried to take down the UVA president, until the UVA faculty and students stood up and rallied exactly where people came with torches on Friday night.

Charlottesville is complicated (it is part of the South after all).  Virginians owned slaves.  They fought to keep slavery alive as an institution.  But their general was also seen as a model of racial reconciliation after the war.  However, the fact is, he fought for side that did not believe all people are equal.

I live in Charlottesville now.  I am so proud of my city for standing up to hate, but I also feel devastated. For Heather and Jay and Berke.  For their families.  For our city.

I told my kids that a young woman died this weekend.  She was there to ask the other side why they believed what they did.  She did nothing wrong.  She wanted to literally stand up for equality and love.  I told the kids that someone killed her.  “Was it one of the people that doesn’t believe we’re all equal?” my daughter asked.

“Yes.” I answered.

She put that together. And the kids listened to a talk on forgiveness (on the radio.  I still can’t).  I know God wants me to say that He loves Charlottesville. Everyone in Charlottesville, even the people who were there for the weekend.  I can’t say that yet.  Wiser people can.  I am just not there yet, God. I’m sorry.

Nonetheless, here are five redemptive moments from today:

1) Little guy choosing flowers at Hedge and walking down to the memorial. Little guy putting down three flowers (for Heather and the two police officers).

2) Hearing jazz on the Mall, walking towards the music, and seeing a woman in a wheelchair playing “America the Beautiful” on her saxophone.

3) Seeing my friend and fellow mom on TV bringing cookies to the police department.

4) Finding out that gofundme page for a black man beat up (by people who think they are better because of something over which they had zero control) raised more than $100,000.

5) Admiring painted rocks (“You rock!) that are part of the kindness project.

Tomorrow is back-to-school training.  Last week, I realized that there is no set curriculum for me to use.  This morning, I saw a friend posted an article on creating a Charlottesville Curriculum to teach love and tolerance.  Yes, yes, yes.  May I have the diligence and patience to create a curriculum for these newcomers to the United States that emphasizes everything that is great about this country while being honest about what holds us back.  May God help teachers this year.  May God help us all.

And please keep praying for Charlottesville!!!

Thank you,

Elena

P.S. God, help us. I keep thinking of the prayer of St. Francis.

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace
Where there is hatred let me sow love
Where there is injury, pardon
Where there is doubt, faith
Where there is despair, hope
Where there is darkness, light
And where there is sadness, joy
O divine master grant that I may
not so much seek to be consoled as to console
to be understood as to understand
To be loved as to love
For it is in giving that we receive
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned
And it’s in dying that we are born to eternal life
Amen.